christian living, control, faith walk, God first, grace, humility, impatience, perseverance, relationships, trust
The thought started small, and I assumed, innocent enough. After all, I’m just thinking what I’m thinking. But as it bubbled up, I didn’t put it in check, rather I watched it, or let it, too quickly come to a boil. The problem for me as a high verbal person, is thoughts that heat up inside me, soon tumble out of me.
How many times would it have been good to douse myself with the proverbial bucket of water? To put out the flame of my words before they could scorch another?
If you don’t or haven’t struggled with controlling your words, please keep reading and willingly understand better, those of us who do! Often, it’s those closest to us that are seared by the pain of uncontrolled words shooting out like fireworks.
I have analyzed the progression asking myself, what takes me from zero to blaster so quickly? My personal conclusion? I’m trying to control something: a situation, an outcome, or a perception. I’m controlling and not trusting.
As the temperatures outside have soared, I began to see the correlation to the “heat” that sometimes rises within me. If this is you too, can I first remind you that you are Seen, Known and Loved by your Creator. Say them together: Seen, Known and Loved. He sees us every moment, all the time. He sees us at our best and our worst. He knows AND He loves. Let that sink in for a moment or longer. When the heat rises I need to be refreshed!
Because of Christ we are forgiven for our yesterdays, todays and tomorrows. We are cleansed, made right, eternally loved and deeply known. I admit that I have not always tapped into this truth that Christ died to secure. I continue, like a 2 year old, saying I can do it myself. And as Dr. Phil asks, How’s that working for you?
Friends, it takes surrender of self to live like Christ. I admit I usually think I know stuff! BUT the God who created me and sent His only Son, knows infinitely more than I. So how do I set my need to lead, know and decide, down and invite Him and His infinite wisdom into the process? It’s a daily, moment by moment putting down my pride, my “I can do it myself” bravado and surrendering, resting, in His tender, loving care. I have to allow His love, His words and His truth to refresh my soul.
Lean in, friend. Not stiffly, but like the two year old who finally gives in and slumps over, completely surrendered, head on chest. You too, can let go. Lay it all at His feet and be refreshed by His love for you today.
Whenever and however you can, add His truth to your daily thoughts. Let them refresh you. Read His Word, listen to the audio Bible, listen to a life giving podcast or play worship music that speaks His character and truth. The world is loud and the enemy of our souls loves to keep us from hearing God’s truth.
Here are some verses about being “refreshed” to get you started.
Romans 15: 32- 33 The apostle Paul writing to the church in Rome, hoping to visit the church in Rome, expresses his desire to be with them: 32 so that by God’s will I may come to you with joy and be refreshed in your company. 33 May the God of peace be with you all. Amen. ( we are refreshed by other believers)
Acts 3:2 Times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord, and that he may send the Christ appointed for you, Jesus (relief, rest, refreshing)
Proverbs 3:5-8 5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. 6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. 7 Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. 8 It will be healing to your flesh, and refreshment to your bones. (trusting, acknowledging, turning and fearing bring deep healing and refreshment)
christian living, comparison, faith walk, grace, humility, impatience, life experience, relationships
I recently visited a friend in Prescott, Arizona. On our walk around the neighborhood, I stopped to capture an image of the blossoming beauties by the roadside. This high desert area is not just home to cactus, but oaks, cottonwoods, pines and junipers. Rugged granite outcroppings also dot the landscape.
The cactus, like the boulders, stand in contrast to the green of the trees around them. They are also prickly, spiny and tough. The flower, soft by contrast, reminds me the cactus has a purpose. It is food for many critters of the high desert. Fruit grows where the flower blooms, right between the thorns.
I admit, I haven’t always appreciated cacti. I see their thorns and characterize them as worthy of a wide berth. But I’m reminded that their exterior purposefully protects the fruit for the animals equipped to eat it, in spite of the spiny thorns.
So what do you think of when you see a cactus? Do you see danger or resilience? Do you see a meal or a menace? Are they prickly or purposeful?
It was good for me to reconsider and contemplate this spiky, desert dweller. What I know about myself is, I am too often, too quick to judge and steer clear. I’ve even met a few prickly people, and have been one more than I like to admit. Ouch!
I’m thankful I was reminded to slow down, reconsider and contemplate God’s purposes for his creation, prickly or not.
We’ve all been created on purpose and with purpose.
This is my prayer: Lord, I want to live with and see your purpose in all of your creation – whether the prickly pear cactus, or people that seem prickly on the outside. Help me to contemplate and consider all you have made, and respond kindly. Let me live my purpose for You with passion and sincerity.
“For through him God created everything in the heavenly realms and on earth.
He made the things we can see and the things we can’t see—
such as thrones, kingdoms, rulers, and authorities in the unseen world.
Everything was created through him and for him.” Colossians 1:16 ESV
christian living, faith walk, friendship, God first, grace, Hospitality, relationships
Nothing stirs my emotions like a favorite aroma. My mom used to make cinnamon bread on Sunday mornings before church. One sniff and I am transported to the place where I experienced the fragrant memory. I used a particular lotion on my first mission trip and every time I smell it, I am right back in rugged, rural Brazil.
Fragrance is a powerful memory prompt.
One of the first things we planted, 8 years ago, was my star Jasmine. It is in full bloom and smells fabulous. I knew it would take awhile to get all my landscape ideas off the paper and into planters, so I started with a few pots on our patio. From the beginning, I was imagining sitting and sipping, while the fragrance of the jasmine wafted by. My starry eyed climbers have not disappointed me.
It made me think about the aroma of me. No, not my physical smell, rather, the memory of me that remains after being together with another. We all leave a “scent” memory in how we make people feel and what their thoughts turn to after spending time with us. Wow! I had to sit with that for a bit.
Paul talks about it in his letter to the Corinthian church. He says we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and /or perishing. We can be a fragrance of spiritual life or death for others. If you are a little convicted by that thought, I’m already in line ahead of you!
But look closely at the verse below. It starts with “Christ always leads”. What follows is our privilege as followers of Jesus, we get to participate by His grace. Then it says, “through us spreads the fragrance”. It’s awesome and more than a little humbling that we get to be “spreaders” of grace. But it always starts with Christ. Not me. Not you. Christ. He is before all, and in all things! We GET to spread the fragrance of him! It’s an incredible privilege as beloved children of the King of King’s!
“Christ always leads us in triumphal procession, and through us spreads the fragrance of the knowledge of him everywhere. For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life.” 2 Corinthians 2:14-16
This is my prayer: Jesus, we want to smell like you! May anyone who interacts with us recall the sweet fragrance of the fruit of the spirit, the fruit of Your vine, growing in us. May they be drawn closer to you because we faithfully serve up the Gospel on fragrant platters of love.
christian living, faith walk, grace, humility, impatience, life experience, Prayer, relationships, resilience, restoration
Can I be honest? I found myself more than irritated with the “customer service” rep on the other end of the phone. I thought my request was simple enough, but I ended up with a bigger mess. Sadly, my irritation was obvious, and I was more direct than needed with the agent. Sad face.
My quick words with their edgy tone have been an uphill battle for me. How is it that my love of words is also a tripping hazard?
My sweet husband reminds me that all isn’t lost and I have made progress in this verbal arena. He says I’m slower to be reactive and harsh with my words. Yay! But I still ask myself what have I done to soften my tone and find gentler/kinder phrasing?
- I confess to the Lord, who is always there, ready to listen.
- I admit that I still struggle to soften my words and my tone.
- I ask forgiveness from the Forgiver of all.
As I am humbled again, by His grace,
- it occurs to me that the customer service rep also needs an apology from me.
Feel free to check on me and ask me how the apology went. I’ll appreciate the accountability.
If there is a lesson you are learning on repeat, would you please share it with me in an email? I’d love to pray for you as you graciously learn to repeat the lesson less often!
“A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.” Proverbs 15:4
“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.” Proverbs 21:23
christian living, faith walk, God first, grace, impatience, life experience, parenting, relationships, resilience
In my teens I thought thirty somethings were over-the-hill, ancient people. Then when I turned 30, it felt like a light clicked on and I understood life better. After all, I was the oldest I had ever been.
My husband and I carried this phrase into parenting. We used to say, often with a knowing chuckle, “they are the oldest they have ever been.” The reason for the phrase was to recall our own growth journey and in turn find grace for our children.
At two, our toddler son felt like the king of the world with all his new abilities. Often saying, “I do it myself!” The confidence with each stage of development continued – single digit to tween, we’d say, “He’s the oldest he’s ever been.” When he was 18, was a senior in high school AND living at home, unique challenges and lively discussions abounded about house rules, freedom of choice and personal responsibility.
That son is now respectably closer to forty than eighteen. He’s more mature and thankfully, so am I.
I saw my forties as a great awakening of sorts. I dug deep into who I was – a child of God and my parents, baby sister to 4 siblings, but also a wife for 20 years, mom to three who was seeing life through her own longer lived experience.
The grace part became beautifully and deeply real. I needed to give grace like I had already received it.
Aging is an ebb and flow of living and learning. Wherever the Lord has you on the “you are as old as you’ve ever been” continuum, look in the mirror and accept that there is grace enough for you at every age. Then, freely give others lots of grace for their aging experience.
We are all the oldest we have ever been!
“… he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God…” Ephesisans 2:7-8
“…to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight…” Ephesians 1:6-8
christian living, faith walk, friendship, life experience, Listening, perseverance, Prayer, relationships, spirituality
I love my yellow boots. Although they are perfect for mucking through garden mud and planting pansies, they could hardly be called the “right shoe” for a day at the office or a night out when I need a more polished look. Understanding the “right shoe for the job” has many helpful implications.
There have been many times when I failed to choose the right “shoe or tool” for a situation.
- What tone of voice is best? House shoes or Military boots?
- What facial expression communicates my heart? Brightly colored sandals?
- When is a hug needed more than words? Fuzzy slippers might do the trick.
- When does listening have a greater impact than speaking? Sneakers are multipurpose and particularly good for listening due to their quiet nature.
I’ve been on a quest to identify the right shoes for the job. Some tasks call for shoes that are comfortable for more than 2 hours, ( wouldn’t it help if they were labeled by their hours of wear time!) but I’m also learning that what is most comfortable for me, isn’t always best for the situation. My yellow boots may be great for stomping through the yard, but the lighter footprint required at times, means a shoe change for me.
It’s ironic that I can learn so much when wearing my garden stomping boots and yet I can fail at the finesse needed in more delicate circumstances.
If you also need a little help choosing your shoes, or communication tools, spend time with these encouraging words of wise counsel from God’s Word, the Bible.
“The heart of the wise makes his speech judicious and adds persuasiveness to his lips. Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.” Proverbs 16:23-24
“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” James 1:5
Lord, help me to seek your wisdom about the right tools and shoes for the job! May I know when to step lightly and when to quietly listen.
