christian living, control, faith walk, God first, grace, humility, impatience, perseverance, relationships, trust
The thought started small, and I assumed, innocent enough. After all, I’m just thinking what I’m thinking. But as it bubbled up, I didn’t put it in check, rather I watched it, or let it, too quickly come to a boil. The problem for me as a high verbal person, is thoughts that heat up inside me, soon tumble out of me.
How many times would it have been good to douse myself with the proverbial bucket of water? To put out the flame of my words before they could scorch another?
If you don’t or haven’t struggled with controlling your words, please keep reading and willingly understand better, those of us who do! Often, it’s those closest to us that are seared by the pain of uncontrolled words shooting out like fireworks.
I have analyzed the progression asking myself, what takes me from zero to blaster so quickly? My personal conclusion? I’m trying to control something: a situation, an outcome, or a perception. I’m controlling and not trusting.
As the temperatures outside have soared, I began to see the correlation to the “heat” that sometimes rises within me. If this is you too, can I first remind you that you are Seen, Known and Loved by your Creator. Say them together: Seen, Known and Loved. He sees us every moment, all the time. He sees us at our best and our worst. He knows AND He loves. Let that sink in for a moment or longer. When the heat rises I need to be refreshed!
Because of Christ we are forgiven for our yesterdays, todays and tomorrows. We are cleansed, made right, eternally loved and deeply known. I admit that I have not always tapped into this truth that Christ died to secure. I continue, like a 2 year old, saying I can do it myself. And as Dr. Phil asks, How’s that working for you?
Friends, it takes surrender of self to live like Christ. I admit I usually think I know stuff! BUT the God who created me and sent His only Son, knows infinitely more than I. So how do I set my need to lead, know and decide, down and invite Him and His infinite wisdom into the process? It’s a daily, moment by moment putting down my pride, my “I can do it myself” bravado and surrendering, resting, in His tender, loving care. I have to allow His love, His words and His truth to refresh my soul.
Lean in, friend. Not stiffly, but like the two year old who finally gives in and slumps over, completely surrendered, head on chest. You too, can let go. Lay it all at His feet and be refreshed by His love for you today.
Whenever and however you can, add His truth to your daily thoughts. Let them refresh you. Read His Word, listen to the audio Bible, listen to a life giving podcast or play worship music that speaks His character and truth. The world is loud and the enemy of our souls loves to keep us from hearing God’s truth.
Here are some verses about being “refreshed” to get you started.
Romans 15: 32- 33 The apostle Paul writing to the church in Rome, hoping to visit the church in Rome, expresses his desire to be with them: 32 so that by God’s will I may come to you with joy and be refreshed in your company. 33 May the God of peace be with you all. Amen. ( we are refreshed by other believers)
Acts 3:2 Times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord, and that he may send the Christ appointed for you, Jesus (relief, rest, refreshing)
Proverbs 3:5-8 5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. 6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. 7 Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. 8 It will be healing to your flesh, and refreshment to your bones. (trusting, acknowledging, turning and fearing bring deep healing and refreshment)
christian living, comparison, faith walk, grace, humility, impatience, life experience, relationships
I recently visited a friend in Prescott, Arizona. On our walk around the neighborhood, I stopped to capture an image of the blossoming beauties by the roadside. This high desert area is not just home to cactus, but oaks, cottonwoods, pines and junipers. Rugged granite outcroppings also dot the landscape.
The cactus, like the boulders, stand in contrast to the green of the trees around them. They are also prickly, spiny and tough. The flower, soft by contrast, reminds me the cactus has a purpose. It is food for many critters of the high desert. Fruit grows where the flower blooms, right between the thorns.
I admit, I haven’t always appreciated cacti. I see their thorns and characterize them as worthy of a wide berth. But I’m reminded that their exterior purposefully protects the fruit for the animals equipped to eat it, in spite of the spiny thorns.
So what do you think of when you see a cactus? Do you see danger or resilience? Do you see a meal or a menace? Are they prickly or purposeful?
It was good for me to reconsider and contemplate this spiky, desert dweller. What I know about myself is, I am too often, too quick to judge and steer clear. I’ve even met a few prickly people, and have been one more than I like to admit. Ouch!
I’m thankful I was reminded to slow down, reconsider and contemplate God’s purposes for his creation, prickly or not.
We’ve all been created on purpose and with purpose.
This is my prayer: Lord, I want to live with and see your purpose in all of your creation – whether the prickly pear cactus, or people that seem prickly on the outside. Help me to contemplate and consider all you have made, and respond kindly. Let me live my purpose for You with passion and sincerity.
“For through him God created everything in the heavenly realms and on earth.
He made the things we can see and the things we can’t see—
such as thrones, kingdoms, rulers, and authorities in the unseen world.
Everything was created through him and for him.” Colossians 1:16 ESV
christian living, faith walk, God first, impatience, life experience, perseverance, Prayer, resilience, trust, Uncategorized
I’m a fixer, a get it done girl, an advanced planner and someone who likes to think she has some control over situations and circumstances. As I prepare to share messages about Ruth, Tamar and Miriam, I’ve been juggling thoughts as I’ve been reading, highlighting and underlining. The question each story begs to know: What’s a girl to do when she bumps into circumstances beyond her control?
What I am learning from these women helps to answer that question:
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Ruth, widowed and without means, followed her bitter mother-in-law, Naomi, back to her homeland. Ruth gleaned for leftover grain, the only option she had. Yet she became the great grandmother of King David and is listed in the genealogy of Christ.
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Tamar was deceived and abandoned. She deceived in return. It’s a sordid tale. And yet it’s in scripture, perhaps as a cautionary tale. Poor choices and all, Tamar is also named in the lineage of Christ.
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Miriam bravely watches her brother Moses as he is saved by Pharaoh’s daughter, then challenges his God ordained authority, after all the miracles of the exodus. But she is the first woman to be called a prophetess in the Bible.
All of these women had something in common, besides being far from perfect, they didn’t know how their story would end. None of us do. Yet in the midst of it all, the ugly, the hard and harrowing, they encountered the God who created them, loved them and was still writing their stories.
How are you responding to circumstances that feel beyond your control? Are you trying to fix? Or are you trusting God has a plan?
Perhaps, like me, you need to be reminded that your story is still being written. That God is trustworthy even in our unknown and seemingly unfixable. The God who knew and loved Ruth, Tamar and Miriam, also knows and loves you. He’s the author of all of our stories. I’m daily learning to trust Him in all things.
PRAYER: “Lord, let me be a willing participant in all you are doing. Your ways are not my ways, they are often beyond my comprehension. Let me trust you and walk with you. Not away from you or ahead of you. Continue to teach me and draw me to yourself.”
“The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9 ESV
christian living, faith walk, grace, humility, impatience, life experience, Prayer, relationships, resilience, restoration
Can I be honest? I found myself more than irritated with the “customer service” rep on the other end of the phone. I thought my request was simple enough, but I ended up with a bigger mess. Sadly, my irritation was obvious, and I was more direct than needed with the agent. Sad face.
My quick words with their edgy tone have been an uphill battle for me. How is it that my love of words is also a tripping hazard?
My sweet husband reminds me that all isn’t lost and I have made progress in this verbal arena. He says I’m slower to be reactive and harsh with my words. Yay! But I still ask myself what have I done to soften my tone and find gentler/kinder phrasing?
- I confess to the Lord, who is always there, ready to listen.
- I admit that I still struggle to soften my words and my tone.
- I ask forgiveness from the Forgiver of all.
As I am humbled again, by His grace,
- it occurs to me that the customer service rep also needs an apology from me.
Feel free to check on me and ask me how the apology went. I’ll appreciate the accountability.
If there is a lesson you are learning on repeat, would you please share it with me in an email? I’d love to pray for you as you graciously learn to repeat the lesson less often!
“A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.” Proverbs 15:4
“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.” Proverbs 21:23
christian living, faith walk, God first, grace, impatience, life experience, parenting, relationships, resilience
In my teens I thought thirty somethings were over-the-hill, ancient people. Then when I turned 30, it felt like a light clicked on and I understood life better. After all, I was the oldest I had ever been.
My husband and I carried this phrase into parenting. We used to say, often with a knowing chuckle, “they are the oldest they have ever been.” The reason for the phrase was to recall our own growth journey and in turn find grace for our children.
At two, our toddler son felt like the king of the world with all his new abilities. Often saying, “I do it myself!” The confidence with each stage of development continued – single digit to tween, we’d say, “He’s the oldest he’s ever been.” When he was 18, was a senior in high school AND living at home, unique challenges and lively discussions abounded about house rules, freedom of choice and personal responsibility.
That son is now respectably closer to forty than eighteen. He’s more mature and thankfully, so am I.
I saw my forties as a great awakening of sorts. I dug deep into who I was – a child of God and my parents, baby sister to 4 siblings, but also a wife for 20 years, mom to three who was seeing life through her own longer lived experience.
The grace part became beautifully and deeply real. I needed to give grace like I had already received it.
Aging is an ebb and flow of living and learning. Wherever the Lord has you on the “you are as old as you’ve ever been” continuum, look in the mirror and accept that there is grace enough for you at every age. Then, freely give others lots of grace for their aging experience.
We are all the oldest we have ever been!
“… he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God…” Ephesisans 2:7-8
“…to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight…” Ephesians 1:6-8
christian living, faith walk, God first, impatience, Listening, perseverance
For someone who wants to be heard, I am a terrible listener at times. I’m determined to make a change in this behavior, so I started looking through my wisdom book (the Bible) for the word listen or hear. I discovered authors often paired listen with “they did not”!
How many times I’ve gone to the Lord in prayer so full of my own words, but I did not stop to listen to His words. I pray with a checklist of my hurts, hang ups and hopes. I spew them out rapid fire, asking God to fix it all, make it better and then…
end my prayer –
Because I have “stuff to do”. I’m busy. Overwhelmed.
I don’t stop and listen.
Listening applies to so many areas of life. I’m not good at listening to what my body is telling me. Without adequate rest, I push myself. I push myself emotionally, thinking, “I’ve got it all under control”. A reset in listening is what I need.
For the past several years, rather than resolutions each January, I have adopted a word to focus on through the coming year. The word is one I hope will help frame my actions and behavior toward maturity in meaningful ways.
I don’t know if choosing a word is like asking for patience, but the word listen has been a recurring theme lately. Exposing both my desire to be heard and my shortcoming as a good listener. ouch. If I want others to listen to me, I must practice the art of listening.
Like the people I was reading about in the Bible, I’m slow to listen but quick to speak or act. Listening is a skill gained with practice. This year I’d like to practice being quick to hear/listen and slower to speak and act. I know my husband would appreciate this intentional focus. My body might function better and emotionally, I’ll be better equipped to love and serve others the way I’d like to.
“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” James 1:19
A positive side of listening, particularly to God in His Word, is added wisdom. Proverbs tells me to listen so that I can gain wisdom. “Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future.” Proverbs 19:20
An action with a promise.
I don’t know if you make resolutions, or choose a word of the year, either way I’m praying you “listen” well to what the Lord wants to show you in 2023. The beauty of our faithwalk is how much we can learn about God and His character. In a million lifetimes we could not know it all – but given the chance, I want to develop the skills of a good listener, so that I can apply His knowledge and wisdom to my choices.
Lord, let me learn to listen and grow wise mentally, spiritually, physically and emotionally! In all the ways you created me, let me listen well.
